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Mother’s Day: Is It Always Happy?

May 6, 2010

Mother’s Day is fast-approaching, and while the general perception and media portrayals are that this a happy day for moms throughout the country, my experience and observations have been that for many, Mother’s Day can be a difficult day. I don’t write this with the goal of being a cynical wet blanket on the holiday. Rather, I hope to encourage a sense of awareness and perhaps some sensitivity to those who struggle with this holiday.

For those who have experienced the death of a mother, Mother’s Day can bring up painful feelings of loss. For those who have had a history of a conflicted relationship with their mother, the day can bring to the surface ambivalent memories and feelings. For those who struggle with trying to become the kind of parent they want to be, the day can give rise to feelings of inadequacy and disappointment about their current relationship with their child. For others, the day can be difficult in a variety of different ways.

My own issues with Mother’s Day have been rather minor in comparison to the situations just described. I have been working on finding the balance between honoring the elder mothers in my family with feeling appreciated as a mother in my own right. I’m hopeful that I’ll strike the right note of balance this year. My husband, 3 kids, and I have morning plans for breakfast and a quick trip into the city to browse at one of my favorite craft fairs. And then we’ll be back in time to host some of the other mothers in my family for dinner. I told my husband that what I really wanted for Mother’s Day was to feel appreciated by my kids. From the trips they’re making down to the basement to work on some “secret project,” I think I’m going to get what I wanted!

My sincere wish for you is that you have the kind of Mother’s Day that you desire. I hope you experience the affirmation and appreciation you deserve. I hope you are inspired to support and/or seek support from others when needed. I’d love to hear your comments on your own challenges and success stories in celebrating Mother’s Day.

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